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October 2022 ~ An Anniversary of Devastation

Well, isn’t that a happy title? I know, not the greatest draw to encourage you to continue reading. I haven’t wanted to write much about this, but I guess it’s time to jump in, or at least get my feet wet. I have to admit, when no one is looking, tears still fill my eyes when I think about what we have been through.

Five years ago, one of the largest wildfires (at that time) in California plowed over mountains and into multiple communities wiping out thousands of homes and structures and even taking twenty-two precious lives. The intense heat and chaotic whipping wind left a wake of devastation behind it of ashen heaps. Not a pretty sight.

Our once comfy home, the one I moved into when I married my husband, the one where we raised our three children, and built a life was gone in a matter of a few hours. Everything on our property turned to gray dust and melted globs of metal.

In the middle of the night, I woke up to a familiar smell of fire. I didn’t think much of it until it woke me a second time with more intense smoke. I walked to the end of our street to look in various directions. The burning smell of fire and smoggy skies filled the atmosphere, but I couldn’t see where it was coming from. I figured the fire department must know about it and be responding, so I went back to bed.

Only a few minutes later my daughter came running down the hall yelling we had to get out. Her then-boyfriend (now husband) had called at two in the morning and said the fire was in their neighborhood coming in our direction. We still had power, so she ran to turn on the television. Various areas needed to evacuate. Who would have ever thought that a little house in the middle of a subdivision, surrounded by multiple subdivisions would be overtaken by a wildfire?

My husband, daughter, son, and I threw clothes on, loaded the animals in the truck, and we each drove our separate vehicles out of the neighborhood… at a snail’s pace. Families were in their front yards loading their cars. Neighbors knocked on doors, urging people to wake up and get out. Cars were bumper to bumper, a traffic jam of metal on wheels pushing to get out of harm’s way. The smoke created thick fog; the wind whipped embers through an eerily dark night sky disorienting us all. As I drove to the evacuation center where we would gather, I heard explosions and began seeing flames in unexpected places.

I could go into more detail, my mind floods with memories of that night, but I’d rather move past it. Which, thankfully, we have. Five years later, we are back home. We rebuilt adding details we had always talked about but hadn’t gotten to. I have an art room, it’s messy and unorganized, but it is mine and I love it! We have more space for our growing family. Within the last five years, two of my children have gotten married and I am now a happy grandma to a beautiful baby girl.

I am grateful to finally be on this side of the story. When we were first thrown into the complete annihilation of the life we knew, we couldn’t think straight. We walked like zombies, yet somehow life moved forward. We moved forward. I don’t have an explanation for how we survived except for the grace of God and the compassion and generosity of family, friends, and even strangers.

While I would not have chosen to go through this experience, I do know it changed me. I hope for the better. Some things were shaken off, like broken branches in a gusty wind. Dead things, that weren’t bringing life and health were burned away (pun intended). My focus and my priorities shifted. This shift has over time brought peace in a new way. New life. New purpose. New priorities.

In my church small group, we have been going through Ruth Chou Simons, Gracelaced. It is a lovely study with beautiful artwork generously filling each page. This week the theme was Rejoice, even in suffering. She talks about fire melting resin on pinecones causing them to open, and drop their seeds which then will create new growth. It is called “serotiny”. I remember learning in amazement about it at my sixth-grade outdoor camp. Little did I know how much the concept would color my life decades later.

While extreme heat and fire may seem destructive at the moment, in the long run, they may be what is needed to create new, healthy growth. What a picture of how we can grow from devastation. Don’t misunderstand, I’m not from the camp that believes God puts tragedy on people. Giving an answer as to why bad things happen is too lofty for me to try to answer, besides simply saying… sin entered the world, so the door was open for pain and suffering to rush in.

What I do know from my experience is this… God is faithful, and He can take the suffering in our lives and turn them into something good. I’m not saying the process is easy, or without pain. It’s not. But through it all, He is there. We are not abandoned. And hopefully, if we allow ourselves to be pliable in His hands we are made more and more into His image. And that is a very good thing.

Check out this cool video on how serotiny works: Serotinous Cone in Toaster Oven Time Lapse – YouTube

Our Serotinous Life ~ October 2017 – October 2022


In honor of NaNoWriMo I created a tracking calendar with a few verses that I turn to urge me on. Plus it’s easier for me to keep track of progress on one page. I’m putting it up on my fridge (the place I go several times a day) as a reminder and hopefully to inspire me to get to the finish line. Happy National Novel Writing Month! Get your free tracking calendar below:

Tahoe, California

Breaking down how to make change ~ October 30, 2021

We all have things we’d like to change in our lives.

From keeping a cleaner house, to losing weight, or developing a consistent workout schedule, to finishing writing that book, or making consistent time to nurture a friendship, to interacting more with your children or an older parent, or even learning to like ourselves more. There are so many areas, if you’re like me, that could use a sprucing up, or downright intervention. But how do we approach change without feeling like a failure before we even begin? Well… my simple answer is: start small, and the most effective answer is: seek divine intervention (you may think I’m kidding… I’m not). 😊

I am far from perfect. In fact, I don’t even try, but I do still want to see improvement in my own life. Like all of us, some things are completely out of my control. But I do in some capacity have control of myself or my responses and reactions to whatever might be happening. As I’ve progressed in age, I’ve learned a few things, and I anticipate learning a whole lot more by the time I’m a hundred and ten. But I can hopefully give you a little boost with some of the things I’ve used to help me make changes.

I’ve created a little personal assessment questionnaire, a list of ten questions that may help you determine how to approach a change you would like to make. I hope you find it helpful.

How to make changes in your life:

  1. Know yourself – What are you really going to do (you don’t have to be like everyone else)
  2. Know what your schedule allows (realistic timeframes and awareness is necessary so you don’t drive yourself crazy or set yourself up for failure)
  3. Know your priorities (what is most important to you?)
  4. Know what you are willing to change and recognize your bandwidth to do it (again see #1)
  5. Know how to eat a pea (start with something small)
  6. Know how to eat an elephant (one bite at a time – don’t look at the whole elephant with every bite; take a step back and…)
  7. Know what you can do now (what is the first bite or step that you can and are willing to take at this time)
  8. Know how to motivate yourself for the end result (what will make the difference to you getting to the finish line – in other words, “How bad do you want it? Why do you want it?”)
  9. Put up post-it notes (write out motivation statements that work for you, everywhere you need to see them – do not bash yourself – stay positive)
  10. Reward yourself in a healthy way when you take steps forward (recognize your successes)

I also created free downloadable motivation cards to help you on your journey. Take it one goal at a time. I’d love to hear what your goal is and encourage you along.

Father, be with my friend as they journey into their goal. You know what they need to be successful and reach their end result. Help them to choose a goal that is a benefit to them and those around them, one that will contribute to their health and well-being spirit, soul, and body. This in effect will also contribute to the health and well-being of the world around them. Let them honor their progress in a constructive way and remind them they are worth the effort to move forward. Strengthen them when they are feeling weak or less than motivated. Remind them at just the right time of the vision you have given them so they may run with purpose and power. Encourage them on their way and bless their steps. Remind them they are made in your image and are a blessing to this world at this time to this generation. Thank you, you are always with us, cheering us on. For your glory, I pray for them. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

You’ve got this!

Finish… Santa Rosa Marathon

Musing on Writing ~ July 2, 2021

You can probably tell if you have been following me for any length of time that I am obsessed with Yosemite. There is so much to see. So much majesty everywhere you turn. It is a magical place! It has become an inspiration and a backdrop for much of the creative ventures I have been pursuing in the last few years.

In July of 2018, I was awakened by a vivid dream. I know, you can shake your head, but I have had a lot of dreams that wake me up with ideas, don’t ask me why. I just go with it when it happens. I had a scene play out in my dream and woke up with the impression of an entire storyline about these characters. It was not a convenient time to start pursuing writing. I was in the middle of working full time and going to school to finish my school nurse credential and master’s. Not to mention we were living in a rental and trying to rebuild a home that was totally annihilated by the Tubbs Fire. Our entire neighborhood was flattened by a voracious wildfire. But that is another story. My point is… it wasn’t a good time for the creative muse to show up and demand attention. But she wouldn’t be silent and so I listened to the urgency she pressured me with and began to write every free moment I had. Often staying up past midnight, knowing I was going to be hurting with the responsibilities the next day. But… I had to write.

I couldn’t keep it in my head, it had to see the light of day. I pulled out my computer and let my fingers fly. I was compelled to strike while the iron was hot. I have regretted the times I have ignored the creative muse in the past and thought I could let it wait for another day. If you wait until it grows cold the iron will not meld with the form you want it to take. It will either break or you’ll give up because it is just too hard to mold. Sometimes you do have the option to play with the embers, to just keep it going until you can finally blast some fuel on it to explode with possibilities.

I struck the match that sunny morning. I wrote the first scene, the one that woke me up. And because I am what you call a pantzer writer, I wrote as fast as I could trying to keep up with the story that poured out of my head. It had a mind of its own and ran wherever it pleased, and often to places I would have never gone had I stopped to think about it. Over the last three years, this one story has turned into over 300,000 words and numerous other offshoot stories. Today I am working on going back to the beginning to edit and fine-tune while continuing to follow the ideas that keep streaming from the original idea. I am trying to learn how to make the story accessible to others in the form and manner that it was meant for.   

I hope all the hours and hundreds of thousands of words will have an opportunity to go out and reach readers who might be blessed by the story. I hope the words will in an entertaining way touch the hearts of readers and inspire them, encourage them and let them know they aren’t alone. I have many hopes for what might be. I remind myself my job is to put the words on paper and hone my craft as best I can, but the fruit is up to God. So, if you are so inclined, I welcome any offerings of pray you might have to encourage the story on its way.

I hope this inside view of my creative process has brought some encouragement to your day, and maybe even inspired you to strike while the iron is hot. The creative muse is not always convenient.

“Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable and pleasing in Your sight, O Lord, my [firm, immovable] rock and my redeemer.”  

~ Psalm 19:14 (Amp)

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago. ~ Ephesians 2:10

You Are God’s Masterpiece ~ April 27, 2021

If you think about how seeds work. They drop from their source, become disconnected from the parent, and fall to the ground, they are buried under dirt, in the dark soil. It is a form of death. But, when the appointed time comes life springs forth from what appeared dead, life comes from the purpose placed inside the seed long before it dropped to the ground. And as the plant grows, depending on what kind of plant it is, it bears fruit and brings nutrients and life to others.

In John 12:24 Jesus says that if a seed falls to the ground and dies, it will bear fruit. We know unless a seed is planted it isn’t going to do much of anything. In the verse above Jesus was speaking of more than just a seed, He was also talking about Himself, and even us. He knew when He spoke those words in only a short time He would be experiencing death. He would be buried in a tomb. But He knew… that was not the end. He was the seed spoken of long before, the seed of Abraham (see Galatians 3:16). The seed that would take the weight of the sin of the world and be buried with it… BUT… on the third day… at the appointed time, He would rise. Resurrection!

The power of the resurrection. The power that turned death to life. That same power is available to all who receive the gift of salvation by Christ’s offering. We can be transformed from death to life, just like a seed, and in turn, bear much fruit. We are appointed to bear fruit that remains (see John 15:16) that brings nutrients to those that receive it. God’s masterpiece, making the old new, exchanging darkness for light, death for life. A life empowered to “… do the good things He planned for us long ago.”

That I may know him and the power of his resurrection and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.

PHillipians 3:10,11

Above the Noise ~ March 17, 2021

Noise is made by vibrations. Our voices form sound in our vocal cords as air rushes past the thin folds in our larynx creating a pitch. From that growl in our throat, the air escapes over our tongue and through our teeth to form a sound. But is that sound decipherable for others? Is it clear, discernable? Does it produce words or meaning? Does it give life to the hearer?

There are so many voices in this world competing for our attention. I don’t really want to contribute to the noise. Honestly, I really like the quiet. But sometimes sound is worth listening to. The rushing of a waterfall, the crescendo of an orchestra, the still small voice. Some sounds or words soothe the soul, lift the spirits, minister to the deep caverns of our hearts with the reminder we’re not alone.

I don’t just want to add my voice to the cacophony. I pray I discern between the song and the noise. I pray I focus on the important rather than what seems urgent, and bring beauty, faith, and hope in whatever offering I give. I want what I present to be worth something, to be a benefit for the hearer. I don’t want to tickle ears. Instead, I want to reach hearts. If I open my mouth, if I sing my song, or write my words, the ones meant for me to give, I pray they will bless you, dear reader. That is why I’m here.

At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison – that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak. Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. ~ Colossians 4:3-6 (ESV)

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. ~ Ephesians 4:29 (ESV)

If even lifeless instruments, such as the flute or the harp, do not give distinct notes, how will anyone know what is played? And if the bugle gives an indistinct sound, who will get ready for battle? So with yourselves, if with your tongue you utter speech that is not intelligible, how will anyone know what is said? For you will be speaking into the air. ~ 1 Corinthians 14:7-9 (ESV)

Emerald pools, Yosemite

How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns.”

Isaiah 52:7

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